je ne sais pas

je ne suis pas sûr qu'écrire de, donc j'écrirai dans le français. mon jour était assez stupide. la plupart du temps j'attendais ma mere de descendre de l'ordinateur. j'ai écouté de la musique pendant quelque temps. je suis assez sûr pour Noël je recevrai un téléphone cellulaire, je suis formidable excité. je n'ai pas eu de cellule depuis une longue période. je ne peux pas attendre de faire la nourriture française dans la classe française, ratatouille, la tarte aux pommes et plus. bien je suis fait avec mon blog français, goodnight chacun.

Dreams

They are so weird. Your dreams are supposed to mean something, like a message your brain is trying to tell you or something/someone you often think about seems to appear in your dreams. Most of my dreams make me wonder what the fuck they're supposed to mean. They usually make absolutely no sense at all. I've had this one dream at least six or seven times before, not all in a row but spaced out. It shocks me at how exact the dream was, exactly the same every time detail for detail. It started out as me at my condo in Livermore. Out of nowhere, it seems that gravity had stopped, but only people were floating around. I would float up my stairs to find my mom floating above her bed as if she were lying down. Dreams that you have over and over again are supposed to mean that whatever message is within it is very urgent. The dream is trying to get it's point across, but what kind of message is held within this dream??

Delicious Taco Salad

the best fucking food in the world! i make a mean taco salad. all you need is lettuce, avocados, olives, tomatoes, black beans, cheese, hamburger meat, tortilla chips, and sour cream. mix all that shit together and eat the most delicious meal. it's one of my personal favorites. well don't know what else to talk about... today is national pick on priscilla day!! my dad made this joke a few weeks ago saying pick on priscilla day was on the 16th, and sure enough we all remembered that today was that holiday. FUCK!!

Souuuuuuup!

I was heating up some chunky grilled chicken vegetable and pasta soup the other day. The soup was done in the microwave, so I took it out and went to smell it. Out of nowhere, I felt this stinging sensation followed by a popping sizzling sound. The soup broth had popped and hit me in the face. I didn't think anything of it at first, but when I went to wipe my face I felt the skin peel off. I decided to go check it out in the mirror in my bathroom, and sure enough there were two holes burnt on my chin. Who the fuck gets burnt by their soup?! It's stupid! I will never again sniff my hot boiling food that comes out of a heating device.

powder puff

the game was pretty fun. i just cheered for megan most of the time. me kim and priscilla all went together with signs for megan. even though the juniors lost, i still had fun. i think ill play next year and tear shit up. peace broseph.

Stuck in a Pickle Jar.

Indeed I am. No holes to breathe oxygen. No escape from the sharp glass prison. Nothing but me, pickle juice, and a half eaten pickle. You see, I got a little hungry and had nothing but a pickle to chomp on. Why is the lid screwed on ever so tightly? If only I could twist it open with a mighty force, but I am too weak. I am unable to open it. I dream of escaping one day, to be free from this torture. I hallucinate the day I have the courage and strength to release myself from this agonizing boredom of being stuck in a pickle jar .

Scrillary Artillery

Russian roulette
no
Pull the trigger
slow
Round and round we
go
Watch your brains
explode

A Stranger to my Eyes

What have you become? It astonishes me that I once knew you, that I was once so close to you. I've drifted apart from you slowly, and I now could hardly glance up at you directly in the eyes. All respect I once had for you vanished into thin air, evaporated leaving no trace of evidence behind. You were the last person I expected to betray me like this. You were the person I thought would catch me when I fell, but you didn't. Instead, you let my motionless body peril downward. You let me fall, arms wailing trying to find any support to grab hold of. All the times I have caught you when you tumbled downward, and you couldn't save me?

We're All Thieves

It's true; whether you've robbed a bank, someone's innocent mind, or boyfriend/girlfriend. We are all victims, accomplices, or leaders of these acts. You can steal someone's heart right out of their beating chest. It could be physical, or it could be mental. We all at one point have robbed someone or someplace of something. Life can even be a thief, it steals friends. It turns them against you at your own will, slowly trying to destroy the little piece of itself that you live. The piece it has once given you, only to snatch it back without a second glimpse. People are robbed of happiness, an emotion one solely thrives to feel. I've robbed myself of dignity, always trying to do what other people want me to do. How am I supposed to believe there is a God if we live in such a cruel world? That's why I just can't.

"help, i'm alive

my heart keeps beating like a hammer.
Hard to be soft, tough to be tender.
Come take my pulse, the pace is on a runaway train..."-
friday after school: i walked to my locker to put my book away when i saw nicole and kayla standing right next to it. i thought this was weird because neither of them go to manteca high. i convinced myself there was nothing of it. i turned to leave, but something grabbed a hold of my hair, and tugged. i dropped my binder with the unexpected maneuver. i felt her arms swinging in an attempt to hit me. a few clocks to the face, not hard or painful. i donkey kicked her from behind getting her off of me. she turned to swing more punches. i ducked my head and grabbed both of her wrists screaming " don't fucking touch me!". i could see a blur of people surrounding us, enclosing us in a tight circle. i've always been on the outside of that circle, watching whatever two idiots thought it was a good idea to fight. being on the inside of that circle felt like a completely different place, a different world. i could faintly hear the crowd yelling "fight! woooo!" cheering it on. i pushed her off of me, grabbed my binder, and left. what has this solved? nothing. fights are pointless. she still hates me just as much as she did before, and it didn't change anything about what had already happened. you can't change the past, only the future, and she just fucked hers up.
the end.

-"If you’re still alive
My regrets are few.
If my life is mine,
what shouldn’t I do?
I get wherever I’m going,
I get whatever I need
while my blood’s still flowing
and my heart still beats."

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

is it really? I'd like to know.. Anyways, the show is fucking amazing. If you've never seen It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, then you better go look it up right now on hulu . I love the episode when they try to do a home makeover the extreme way. They go to some random mexican people's house in the middle of the night dressed all in black with black ski masks on. Mac breaks their door down with a bowling ball wrapped with a chain, replicating a wrecking ball. The family doesn't speak english, and it looks a lot to them like they are getting robbed. I laughed so hard I was crying! :D I would like to tell the end, but you gotta go watch it for yo self bitchesssss!

my gurrls

i'm lucky to have gurrls like these. they will always have my back and make me feel better when i'm down. i used to be upset at the thought of losing my old "best friend", but it is probably for the best. if i were still her friend, who knows what the fuck i'd be like. i can't just stick around with someone when they're always a cold hearted bitch. i can't force myself to be happy when i'm not. nobody can go through life pretending like they are fine the way they are, but inside they want to scream their hearts out. they want everyone to hear the truth, and how they honestly feel. i learned that i can't just do whatever other people want me to do, or i'll never truly be happy. i need to do what i think is best for my life, and not give a shit what other people will think of me. i am who i am, take me or leave me.

colder than my heart, if you could imagine..

sometimes i wonder, will i ever learn. i take you back everytime without a second thought, and every single time you go back to her. you say that it isn't fair to treat her that way, to tell her that she has a second chance and then leave her. isn't that what you did to me? you contradict yourself when you say that, and you don't even realize it. you say that this is the last straw for her. this is the last chance you will give her, but you say that every time. its getting hard to trust the one person i thought i would always trust. the person i thought would always have my back. i guess i was wrong. if this is her last straw, then maybe your last straw already passed. it passed the first time you said you loved me, and the second time. i can't keep waiting around, taking you when you're in a bad place and when you feel better you just go to her again. i'm not your rebound, or something you can just use when you feel like. i just don't know what to do about it..

snakes

are freakin' scary! their venom is hella strong and shit, and it could kill you. this guy on tv got bit by a rattlesnake, and his whole arm was torn apart!!! he had to have hella surgery on his arm to get the infected swollen tissue out. i can't even imagine the pain you'd feel getting bit by an extremely venomous snake, like a black mamba snake. some people even have allergic reactions to the venom, giving it an even more severe effect than it already is. the venom will swell up the bitten area more rapidly, and you'll have a much more extreme effect from the venom. some venom will eat away your tissue, dissolving your skin with it's acidy substance. other venom will thin your blood, making you bleed out your eyes, ears, nose, and mouth. its amazing how people can survive the crazy effects of venom today with the technology and anti-venom scientists have discovered.

meeeeow

It's amazing to me that some people really despise cats. My cat, Abbey, means sooo much to me and i honestly don't know what I'll do when she's gone. I've had her for about 11 years now. I can still remember how we got her and Sammy the first. My dad's friend Rob knocked on our door at our condo in Livermore. Kim and I were about 5 or 6 years old, so of course when we answered the door only to find two adorable kittens, we were ecstatic. He left the two fluffy kittens on our porch, then left as quick as he could. We had no choice but to take them in, it was that or the shelter. It was a good choice in the end. I used to be mean to them, like the time I fed Sammy a listerine strip. He didn't like that very much. Sammy ended up getting cancer and other diseases that forced us to put him to sleep in 2001. I miss him to this day, but at least I still have Abbey. I could just feel a connection when she looks in my eyes, it's like she's saying she loves me and appreciates every pet of love I give her.